Vocal rest...

Hello again!

Here's what the Doctor said: I have vocal nodules again!!

Nodules are like blisters on your vocal chords and the only way to get rid of them is to stop talking. So, that is what i must do for 4-6 weeks. I am certainly going to still write blogs but this should be an interesting time of silence for me.

Previously i had vocal rest in high school for 2 and a half weeks so i'm prepared but this wil be twice as long. Although I am sad, i know that everything happens for a reason and i'm excited to see what God will show me! Enjoy speaking though, what a blessing. :)

Walk with the King

Nodules

Hello everyone.! Thank goodness for Blogs because i may not be able to speak for 6 weeks. Haa! well, I hope you're having a good day today. I just wanted to write a quick blog to inform anyone who stumbles upon this, that I am going to the doctor today to find out if i have nodules on my vocal chords.

Nodules are like blisters on your vocal chords; they're pretty serious, and in some cases can turn into cancer. I had them in high school and i had to go on a vocal-rest ( no talking, whispering, etc) for two and half weeks. needless to say, it wasn't very fun but some people thought it was entertaining! I felt like i was the little mermaid haa.

Either way, today i am journeying to the wonderful ear, nose, and throat doctor to find out if i will have to go on a vocal rest for 6 weeks. I'll also have the pleasure of a nice, big, camera, stuck down my throat. I can't wait! I know that God's will will be done! This is exciting actually, I'll let you know the results!

Walk with the King

Flying: Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. 2 Cor 3:17

What a gift God has given us; dreaming! Why do we dream though? A lot of my dreams come true, so I'm beginning to think there is a purpose for dreams.But, I'm having repeated dreams about flying! According to a "dream dictionary" this is what it's supposed to mean:

To dream that you are flying, signifies a sense of freedom where you had initially felt restricted and limited. Flying as a spontaneous event often includes some special effort, like flapping one's arms, to get going.(I do flap my arms in my dreams!!) These events are precipitated by a strong desire to travel or an imminent danger that requires escape.This may be related to astral projection or an out-of-body experience that some people undergo.

I'm very intrigued by this. But, astral projection; sounds like throwing up!! Haa, I don't know if that description fits my case. I do see how it may signify a sense of freedom where you had initially felt restricted. God is leading me in a different direction this year and I've never felt so free. Almost every night I dream about flying and soaring through the sky of my campus, imaginary places, and oceans. It's awesome except waking up and being bound to the floor. One time, flying in my old back yard, I got stuck in a huge drift in the sky! I couldn't get down! I was carried in the air all the way to Charleston, South Carolina. I love Charleston so I decided to walk around the city and I found myself in a Jazz club... it was amazing! I remember some man finding me and taking me back to downtown Knoxville. I wish I could go back but dreams are always better as dreams.

I was thinking about how much I daydream today. I've stopped expecting my daydreams to be as special as real life because my imagination is too detailed. For example, when I day dream about the home I'm going to grow old in; we'll focus on the wood in the house. The wood has a distinct perfume to it, knots made as my family expands and scrapes, stains that were cried over, holes that were pressed to hold family portraits, and of course the wood of the piano will not be tainted by the smallest speck of dust!! Not to mention the ever so romantic wood that is burning in the fireplace because I don't believe in natural gas. As you see, my dreams are most likely better than the stinky house that I'll eventually inhabit.

Anyways, all of this to say that after having these repeated dreams about flying, I have these huge urges to fly all day long!! Yes, I feel like Jenny from Forrest Gump. Until I was in high school i thought Forrest Gump was Forrest Dump... why would anyone want to see a movie about a dump?? haa..

But on a serious note: 2 Corinthians 3:17 Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.

I think that freedom is something that I am being called to experience. Not only in my dreams but in life. I am free because Christ set me free. We are created to love the LORD, to do His will, and to share His word. The only time we will feel free is when we obey these commands. That's what this life is about.. and I can't wait to stop wasting time and effort being concerned with anything else.

Don't forget to fly

Today

good afternoon! today i was teaching my second day of piano lessons and i realized how much i need to get into character. see, in life you need to be some sort of character in every situation. i think deciding who you are and where you stand in every situation helps you find out who you'll become and i love theater so anytime i can act, i will; of course in good intention and honesty. not to mention building character. but this is different. for instance, this afternoon i realized that i could be more of a piano teacher if i gathered some props. see, i took piano in first grade and i loved it because yes, you guessed it; my teacher was such a character! come with me as i describe her and...pardon a little exaggeration but i think it's necessary. she has the goofiest poofiest white cloud of hair that could be mistaken for cotton candy. it was always styled the same way. maybe one fine day a handsome fellow complimented her and her hair has insisted upon never changing it's style. she had the reddest lipstick that always managed to sneak up on her teeth as if it was it's goal in life. She even had the strong perfume that smelled up the whole room and made it hard to breath, and hard to forget. I loved the way she taught though because she made me think that i was going to be Mozart or at least some sort of Schroeder (that little piano boy in Charles Schultz's Peanuts, Snoopy.. such a jazzy cartoon that's why it's my favorite. this sounds like the next blog topic.)

but back to my piano teacher; she was just marvelous. She knew how to be a character. It's almost as if she decided that her goal in life was to be a piano teacher and to receive every pin of a piano and apple for her sweater sets. now there's nothing wrong with this but me; jack of all trades master of none... i just don't see the point in only one passion. other than Jesus that is. oh gosh but she even had a special pointer stick to follow each note on the page. it probably had her initials on it. either way it made each and every note she pointed to seem like royalty, dainty, and unique. oh and the stickers! other than my trip to the best snack machine ever (always against my mother's rules) the stickers were my favorite part of piano. i remember i had this strange obsession with cats and Elvis Presley. I was ashamed to tell her of my long lost lover so all of my mastered pieces including the ever so complicated "Three Blind Mice," and hits like "Hot Cross Buns" were topped off with a cat sticker. Rarr!!

i loved music because of her but i hated it also because i had such an ear for the songs that the theory was frightening. now, i'm suffering the consequences as the only Junior in a Freshman theory class. oh it's wonderful learning the theory of music instead of simply the art though. to every art there is a theory. if you don't know the theory then you'll never be a true artist of the art. again, this sounds like another blog topic. in conclusion, i say all of this to tell you that i will now be acquiring a collection of only Elvis and kitty cat stickers for my little piano students. maybe i'll even splurge on a few "Excellete" or "Cool Beans!" stickers like the ones you 5th grade teacher gave you when you were too cool for school. oh i can't wait. i'll keep you posted about the strong perfume and poofy hair. but Christmas is right around the corner... and i'm shy on my teacherish apple piano pins for my sweaters!

Praise God

spontaneous combustion!

Hello blog world!

i have to admit that i'm very new to this but i love writing and maybe you're interested! today, it hit me that i'm considered an adult in some people's eyes. i don't feel like an adult. my hands are still the same size, not wrinkly yet. i don't have to plan relaxation, and i haven't started wearing shoulder pads. but contrary to my own thoughts, i did read the newspaper yesterday and completely eliminate almost every article of clothing from high school this weekend. even good old planet exchange didn't take any of my clothes. they must have been pretty bad. but, upon realizing that i am getting older... i need to determine my style of music; what i want to be known for or at least something to strive for.

right now i am writing new songs while taking classes at MTSU in the school of music. the theory is kicking my butt because i have such an ear for music and now it's not such a blessing. it's such a challenge but i know it's where God wants me so He'll get me through. but i can't stop writing jazz and worship hand in hand. they're complete opposites! this is crazy! it's been fun but is it impossible to do both? i really want to write music that sounds like it's jazzy but it's worship. but, i don't know if it'll work because to me, jazz is romantic and worship music is a different kind of romance. sheesh, but i wish they could join in some sexy but pure way! maybe that's the problem with some Christian music. haa, don't worry though, i'm not getting my hopes up on creating a "sexy-christian"style. bump that.

i'm still left with one problem; to me, jazz is only 100% if it's not recorded. i only like to listen to jazz if it's on the radio or live because then it can sustain it's spontaneity. there's just something to be said about those old classic recordings of raw, live, uncaged talent... before computers. i want to do that but remain spontaneous. either because i'm naturally spontaneous or i'm the youngest of 5 girls and it's some warped bid for attention. but, spontaneity also adds to my musical identity crisis! i have to choose a style. one. for at least now. i guess we'll find out... keep singing